Skip to main content

While this time of year is full of twinkling lights and Christmas carols, for some, it can be a time of grief, loss, and sadness. At different times in my life during personal struggles or big transitions, the practice of life-giving affirmations is both helpful and healing to my heart and mind. If the holiday season is challenging for you, here are some words that might help you find peace despite the flurry.

If you feel lonely or sad . . .

The holidays can be hard for many of us. Perhaps you are bummed to find yourself single again, or this is the first year certain loved ones are not at the Christmas table. 

If this time of year feels heavy or painful, try to be extra gentle and gracious to yourself. Take care to extend loving kindness to your own heart, reminding yourself it is okay to feel however you feel at this time. Here are some words of affirmation you can use to work on accepting your feelings with the same graciousness you'd offer a friend:

I do not walk alone.

I do not have to run away or numb the loneliness (sadness, etc.).

Feeling and acknowledging big feelings helps me navigate and pass through them.

It is okay to feel messy sometimes.

I do not have to have it all figured out at this moment.

Ask yourself, “What do I need right now at this moment?”

If you feel triggered at family gatherings . . . 

Let’s be honest. None of us have a normal family; in fact, my grandma used to say normal is only a setting on the dryer. 

Not every family holiday celebration involves joy and making good memories. Sometimes it is triggering, painful, or just plain messy.

Especially around the holidays, remind yourself it is okay to do what is best for your emotional well-being. You can put boundaries in place to protect your own peace while staying as grounded as possible.

Here are some possible words you could say to yourself, to help when engaging with family when it feels difficult:

I can feel safe with my own heart.

I will make choices so I feel safe and present.

I am not responsible for the actions of other people.

I am responsible for myself, how I conduct myself, and how I react.

I can stay present even when I feel triggered.

If you are exhausted from a busy schedule . . .

We have all experienced it at one time or another; the packed schedules that often accompany holidays can be exhausting and tiring. We live in a culture that is obsessed with busyness and staying active all the time. And we sometimes place too high a value on things like productivity and checking tasks off a to-do list.

If you are heading into the holiday season feeling burnt out and tired, consider these words to help you take a step back, a deep breath, and intentionally slow down.

I am worth taking care of myself each day.

Only I am in control of my life.

My yes means yes, and my no means no.

My plate is full of people and things I am blessed to have in my life.

Perhaps the holiday season does not feel difficult or heavy for you. But you might have a friend, neighbor, or coworker who is navigating a harder road than you. Store these away in your own if you need them or if there is someone in your life who may need a little extra love and encouragement this holiday season.