What is your ideal weekend? Do you hang out with a group of friends? Are you more content running errands by yourself? How you spend downtime ties back to your personality preferences. Research by Isabel Briggs Myers and her mother Katharine Briggs identified sixteen personality types based on four pairs of traits: introversion or extroversion, intuition or sensing, thinking or feeling, and judging or perceiving. Each type has a four-letter acronym representing these qualities (such as ENTJ or INFP).
While our MBTI says a lot about our intrapersonal preferences, Social Style® is another personality assessment that gives insight into our behavior. Casey Mulqueen, Ph.D., a psychologist and Director of Research and Product Development at Tracom, a social intelligence company, writes that Social Style "is most effective for understanding how others see us and also for understanding how to interact most effectively with others based on their Styles."
Both models have been extensively researched and put to practical use for decades. Dr. Mulqueen and his team have developed a map of how our MBTI would correspond to four Social Styles quadrants:
- Analytical: INFJ, INTJ, ISTJ, ISTP
- Driving: ENTJ, ESTJ, ESTP, ENFJ
- Amiable: ISFJ, ISFP, INFP, INTP
- Expressive: ENTP, ENFP, ESFJ, ESFP
If you don’t know yours, take the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator® MBTI Instrument test to find out which Social Style you fall under. Then read on for ideas on the best way to plan your weekend to be relaxed and refreshed for the week ahead.
The Analytical Social Style
All of the analytical social styles have a tendency toward introversion, and people often describe you as logical and reserved. You may come off as cool and distant but only because you prefer to interact with others when you feel you have a specific need to do so. You always want to do what’s best and right. So thinking and planning an intentional weekend is your cup of tea.
- INFJ: You seek meaning and connection in your relationships and are passionate about serving the common good. Share a couple hours of your time in ways that align with your values, such as volunteering for a good cause. Then forget about your concerns by getting lost in your intellectual side and reading a new summer novel.
- INTJ: You're organized, independent, and have high standards for yourself and others. You're an idealist and will get disappointed if you feel like you didn't accomplish your ideal "perfect" weekend. So relax your expectations a bit by doing something you already know will fulfill you, like taking a class to refine a current hobby. After all, creativity is great for your health.
- ISTJ: You tend to be serious, practical, realistic, and responsible. Logically, you already know what you need to get done over the weekend. You love a well-ordered and organized life. So don't feel "lame" if you'd rather partake in listening to a great podcast while detoxing your closet or decluttering your home.
- ISTP: You prefer to be a quiet observer, but you're efficient and quick to find last-minute solutions when surprises pop up. You're flexible and enjoy learning new things, so plan for a chill weekend focused on de-stressing while letting others know you're still totally down to join in on their plans, too.
The Driving Social Style
You’re direct and are usually the first to initiate social interactions. You focus your and others’ efforts toward goals you want to accomplish—like trying out that acclaimed restaurant you’ve been hearing about. You thrive on taking action and feel best when you’ve checked things off your to-do list.
- ENTJ: You take a leadership role in all areas of your life so use this strength to plan a fun yet informative weekend. You're usually attuned to what's going on and like to nerd out by expanding your knowledge and sharing that with others. Organize a group trip to see a new exhibit, performance, or start a book club around a topic you enjoy.
- ESTJ: Practical and decisive, you love to coordinate projects and people to get things done in the most efficient way possible. Need to refresh your summer wardrobe? Make it a group event by hosting a clothing swap with your girlfriends rather than hitting the mall. (Plus, it's an easy way to shop ethically—without breaking the bank.)
- ESTP: You're energetic and like enjoying the present moment with others. Material comforts and style refresh you, so why not hit up a flea market with a friend to hunt for cool and affordable treasures to make your place feel like home? It could be just the spontaneous "errand" you need to make a good weekend great.
- ENFJ: Warm and empathetic, you're very sensitive to others' needs and emotions. It makes you happy to see others having a good time. You'll love a bonding group activity you can do outdoors, like a long nature walk or a day of swimming and picnicking.
The Amiable Social Style
Others find you relaxed, partly because you tend to be less demanding and more agreeable in general. People describe you as casual and easygoing, but only if you feel personally secure in your relationships.
- ISFJ: You’re quiet, responsible, and like to keep an orderly and harmonious environment. But you also care about how others feel, and it makes you happy to see those around you happy, too. Get the best of both by going out to see a good movie with friends or planning a Netflix night.
- ISFP: Introspective and sensitive, you prefer to have your own space and to do things on your own time. Schedule some calming self-care rituals to relieve stress: work on a creative side project, see a movie alone, get a massage, or get lost in a good read.
- INFP: You're highly idealistic, so your external life needs to align with your values. Avoid commitments that compromise your principles, or you'll end up feeling pressured, overwhelmed, and maybe even resentful. A solitary stroll, journaling, visiting your local library or having a long, in-depth convo with a dear friend are all weekend activities that will nourish your mind and soul.
- INTP: You're not as interested in socializing as you are in problem-solving. So spend part of your weekend working alone on a personal project and not allowing any distractions. Mindful activities with a meditative aspect are healing—try pottery, playing an instrument, knitting or baking.
The Expressive Social Style
You’re open about expressing your opinions, both positive and negative. Some might say you react impulsively or spontaneously according to your feelings. But others tend to describe you as charming and conversational. You appreciate being affirmed and impromptu experiences (as long as it matches your mood).
- ENTP: You're quick thinking, smart, outspoken, and resourceful. You're good at reading people and routine bores you, so your weekend is best spent meeting new people while learning something new. Grab a wing woman and sign up for a class in something you've always wanted to try.
- ENFP: You are enthusiastic, imaginative, and you like to improvise. Weekends are a time to recharge because you use so much energy during the week. Spend Saturday running errands without a time crunch, then going for coffee or walking downtown with a friend. Reserve the evening for kicking your feet up to watch a dreamy British costume drama. Spend Sunday prepping for another busy (and social!) week ahead.
- ESFJ: You're cooperative and like to work with others. You notice and take care of little things that need attention. You thrive when you're around people who appreciate your contributions. Your ideal weekend involves a mix of socializing with friends and quiet time to recharge for the week ahead—a lazy morning in, a lunch picnic with friends or family, then a quiet afternoon doing to-do lists/admin/life organizing. End with more socializing in the evening by either going out or having people around for a fancy-ish home-cooked meal.
- ESFP: You're outgoing, friendly, and inclusive. You love being with people, enjoy material comforts, and like making things fun. Your flexibility and spontaneity make it easy for you to adapt to new people and environments. Check some items off this summer bucket list with old friends and new.
Photo Credit: Amy Humphries