While You Were Out: America’s World Cup Victory, Cosby Allegations Continue, Greece May Leave Eurozone, and More

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“While You Were Out” is a Friday feature of short notes and commentary from the week. Whether it’s something you’d discuss at the watercooler or at happy hour, you’ll find it on our grid, together with our opinion as to if it’s praiseworthy or cringeworthy. We’re pleased to bring you the Verily editors’ quick takes on the happenings of this week.

USA Wins Women’s World Cup!

In a 5–2 victory against Japan, the U.S. Women’s soccer team brought home the World Cup this week. After taking the lead with four goals in the first half, the U.S. players shocked their opponents, viewers across the globe, and themselves with how speedily they staked claim to the title. As midfielder Carli Lloyd told Good Morning America, “I think it’s huge for women’s soccer. The energy and atmosphere was just unbelievable this World Cup.” A mighty fine role model for girls today, if we do say so ourselves. —Mary Rose Somarriba

Bill Cosby Admitted to Giving Women Drugs Before Sex

This week a judge released testimony from a 2005 case in which Bill Cosby admitted to giving women Quaaludes before sex. Instead of indicting Cosby, that case ended in an out-of-court settlement. The judge released the testimony upon request by the Associated Press in the wake of the more than twenty women who have made allegations of rape or sexual misconduct with drugging. This confession, while now public, is from a past court case and doesn’t impact the comedian’s current legal standing. But it does give the public a sense of the legitimacy behind numerous rape claims that, due to statute of limitations, are now too outdated to take to court. Maybe now we can take a moment to face the facts about the prevalence of sexual assault and the understandable reasons many women don’t immediately report rape. —MRS

Whoopi Goldberg Supports Cosby

Fellow comedian Whoopi Goldberg responded to the Cosby news on The View with skepticism, stating that he remains “innocent until proven guilty.” What’s worse than her blindness to realism is her gall to deflect with a joke about date-rape drugs being used for fun in her day. Joking about something that is tied to violent crimes against countless women—Cosby’s alleged victims and beyond—is just unclassy. You can do better, Whoopi. —MRS

Captain Jack Sparrow Returns

Notorious pirate Captain Jack Sparrow made an appearance at Lady Cilento Children’s Hospital in Brisbane, Queensland, Australia. Depp is currently on location nearby filming for the latest installment of the wildly successful Pirates of the Caribbean franchise and reportedly went directly to the hospital in full costume after a busy day of shooting. Many of the delighted patients posed for selfies with the 52-year-old actor, who says he often travels with his Jack Sparrow costume for such impromptu visits. So sweet! —Hannah Allen White

A Man Attached Balloons to a Chair and Flew, Up-style!

Yes, this really happened. Daniel Boria, a 26-year-old Canadian, has been charged with “mischief causing danger to life” for flying over Calgary in his garden chair before jumping out of the chair with a parachute once the balloons took him too high. The stunt appears to have been an attempt to promote his cleaning products line. Boria injured his ankle upon landing, but no one else was harmed. Ever wondered how many balloons it would take to make you float away? Well, the answer is about 120 with around $9,500 worth of helium. —Sophie Caldecott

Princess Charlotte’s Big Day

Sunday, July 5, was a special day for the British royal family as 2-month-old Princess Charlotte received baptism at St. Mary Magdalene Church in Norfolk, England. The day was full of family tradition. It was held in the same church the late Princess Diana was baptized in. The Princess wore the same baptismal gown worn by the Queen’s children, which is a replica of the one used by Queen Victoria’s children. And Charlotte was brought to the church in a retro pram, which was—of course—a family heirloom. The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, Prince George, and Princess Charlotte made their public debut as a family and were joined by their extended families and Charlotte’s five godparents. —Blanca Therese Morales

Sweet 116

This week Susannah Mushatt Jones, the world’s oldest living person (the third consecutive American to hold the title), celebrated her 116th birthday in Brooklyn. The daughter of sharecroppers and granddaughter of slaves, Jones was born in Alabama in 1899 and moved to New York in 1922, where she worked in childcare and house cleaning. She retired in 1965. Although she never had children of her own, she was born the third of eleven children and, as a result, has more than a hundred nieces and nephews who adore her. Jones says she never smoked or drank alcohol, but her real secret to long life is lots of sleep. —HAW

Tortilla Turntables

As if store-bought tortillas weren’t loved enough as the wraps for our carne asada, it turns out that the Central American staple can also stand in as a replacement for vinyl records. Say what? It’s true. Inspired by a YouTuber who uploaded a mock video of a tortilla playing the “Mexican Hat Dance,” Rapture Records, a vinyl record company, etched music onto a real tortilla to be played on turntables. Vinyl-loving hipsters, worry not, the “Macarena” didn’t sound too good emanating from food. Maybe the problem was that the tortilla requires authentic Central American music, like that of the band Maná (haven’t heard of it? Look it up, please). —BTM

NYSE Reopens After Technical Problem Shutdown

The New York Stock Exchange shut down Wednesday due to a technical glitch that stymied countless investors for several hours. Unknown is how many gray hairs worldwide resulted from this interruption. Taking a break is fine, NYSE; let’s just have it be an expected break for time off next time—like the weekend. —MRS

Greece Votes No in Referendum

It’s no secret that Greece has been in financial trouble for many years now, stuck in cycles of deep governmental debt and bailouts (with strict terms demanding governmental cuts attached) from the powers that be in Europe. This past Sunday the Greek people voted on the issue of whether to accept the terms of a new bailout (which would impose yet more austerity on the country), and their answer was a resounding no. More negotiations are taking place, but if the Greek government can’t figure out a deal that works for everyone soon, it looks like Greece will have to leave the eurozone. —SC

Burt Shavitz, the Burt Behind Burts Bees, Dies at 80

The founder and likeness of Burt’s Bees, Burt Shavitz, passed away Sunday at the age of 80. Shavitz died of respiratory failure in Maine surrounded by his family and friends. What began as Shavitz selling honey by the side of a road in Bangor, Maine, turned into a partnership making candles out of beeswax with Roxanne Quimby. Eventually the pair expanded the line to include personal care products including our favorite items like those amazing lip balms and hand lotions. An image of Burt’s face—and his untamed beard—adorned the company’s labels even after Clorox bought the brand for $925 million in 2007. On its website, the company said Shavitz “has left for greener fields and wilder woods.” —HAW

Unpoppable Bubble Wrap?

The shipping materials business has been fraught with cutthroat competition as retailers—particularly online companies that specialize in shipping—are looking to save every penny possible. The unsuspecting casualty: bubble wrap. Created in 1957 by Sealed Air, it has been losing ground pretty consistently to competitors because it’s so bulky to ship itself. So Sealed Air has birthed a new futuristic product that might have retailers shouting for joy but the rest of us gasping with horror: iBubble Wrap, the unpoppable bubble wrap. Say it ain’t so! Come on, bubble wrap is half the fun of receiving a package—and if anyone disagrees, he or she is clearly untrustworthy. No one can resist bubble wrap.

iBubble Wrap isn’t inflated until it reaches its destination, so it saves a lot of space in transit. When retailers receive the rolls, they will use a special pump (“SPECIAL PUMP!”) to inflate the bubbles, wrap whatever items need to be boxed, and ship them to your door. But even then they won’t be poppable. This is truly the Brave New World that Aldous Huxley warned us about. —HAW

You Look Disgusting

A British beauty blogger, My Pale Skin, made a viral video contrasting the comments she got when she filmed herself barefaced (acne and all) versus when she finished putting on a full face of makeup (spoiler alert: Both sets of comments are horribly cruel). People commented that she looked disgusting in the makeup-free pictures and told her that wearing makeup is deceptive. She highlights the bind that many women find themselves in these days: ridiculed for their bare appearance but told that natural is beautiful at the same time. Naturally perfect? Right. . . . The video is a powerful reminder that, as Baleigh Scott wrote recently for Verily, we need to come to the realization “that our self-worth is not determined by our physical appearance,” regardless of our choice to wear makeup. —SC

FBI Raids Home of Jared of Subway Fame, for Child Porn

Jared Fogle, known for being the face of the sandwich chain Subway, was arrested this week after the FBI raided his house for possession of child pornography. The company scrambled to distance itself from his image, but perhaps the scandal won’t be too damaging. I, for one, eat Subway because it’s cheap, healthy-ish, and consistent, not because of Jared. What this news does, however, is remind us how prevalent a problem porn addiction is. —MRS

Good News of the Week

A group of Muslim organizations in the U.S. consisting of the MuslimARC, the Arab-American Association of New York, and a digital media startup focused on Muslim issues called Ummah Wide, has launched a campaign called Respond With Love to raise funds in order to help rebuild the black churches that burned down in Tennessee, South Carolina, North Carolina, Florida, Ohio, and Georgia following the June 17 shooting in Charleston, South Carolina. California-based imam and Muslim scholar Zaid Shakir explained, “As a small symbol of that solidarity, during this blessed month of Ramadan, we are gathering donations to help rebuild the seven churches that have been burned.” The campaign was launched July 2, and at the time of this posting, Respond With Love has already surpassed its initial goal of $20,000 and raised more than $33,000—inspiring a new goal of $50,000. The fundraiser, which will run through July 18, says on its website, “All houses of worship are sanctuaries. We want for others what we want for ourselves: the right to worship without intimidation, the right to safety, and the right to property.” —HAW